Senator Robert Menendez, a New Jersey Democrat who may or may not be affiliated with the Soprano crime family, has called on the Major League Baseball Players Union to boycott the 2011 MLB All-Star Game, on account of its scheduled locale of Phoenix, Arizona. Apparently, he has a beef with Arizona's proposed immigration law, which would criminalize brown-ness to a degree unseen since 9/12/01.
At the Pierre Page, we ask: Why stop there? There are all sorts of injustices to which the sporting world turns a blind eye. We suggest the following:
Boycott all games in Canada.
Did you know that Canada has so-called "socialized medicine"? If one of our blessed American athletes gets hurt in Canada, he may be out for months while simply waiting to see a Canadian "doctor". We need to make sure this doesn't happen by boycotting all Raptors and Blue Jays home games and starting our own hockey league. In fact, we will finish what the NHL wisely started twenty years ago and move the Canadiens to Poughkeepsie, the Canucks to Gary, the Oilers to Topeka, the Senators to Little Rock, the Flames to Boise, and the Maple Leafs to Mexico City.
