LaRUSSA HIRES McGWIRE IN SHOW OF LOWERCASE-UPPERCASE-AMERICAN SOLIDARITY, FACES QUESTIONING ABOUT McCRAE

Hey Mark, where did you get that milk? Andre Agassi's friend Slim, responds McGwire.

Mark McGwire has been named the St. Louis Cardinals hitting coach for the 2010-2011 Major League Baseball season. Strangely enough, when asked about the reasons behind his choice of McGwire, Tony LaRussa said, "it is based on the United States current climate of change. I feel guys like us, Mark and I, have been victimized for too long now for lowercase and uppercase letters in our last names. Reporters are always asking us ' how do you spell that again' and 'why is one letter a lower case and the other is upper case?'" When asked about his decision to fire lowercase-uppercase-American Hal McCrae, LaRussa cited his recent marriage to a woman who refused to take McCrae's last name. "I told him not to go through with it" LaRussa lamented. "He should have more respect for our struggle."

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/columns/story?columnist=bryant_howard&id=4602077

Manny Ramirez: Idiot, Savant or Baseball Player?

This video is old, but still, can someone please tell me if Manny is a savant or a highly functional victim of Down's Syndrome? Dear Colleen Dominguez, shhh. The adults are talking. Either way, I still think Manny is the most pure baseball player in the game. It's a game, folks. Get over it.  

Some MLB Stats For Your Ass

Let’s take a look at some interesting MLB stats at the ¼ season mark, shall we?

First, the good:

-MN 1B Justin Morneau: 12 2B, 12 HR, 33 RBI, 23 BB, .327 BA, 1.041 OPS

And the even better:

-MN C Joe Mauer: 5 2B, 8 HR, 24 RBI, 13 BB, .417 BA, 1.319 OPS (in only 19 games)

And now the bad:

-MN SS Nick Punto: 2 2B, 0 HR, 11 RBI, 16 BB, .193 BA, .506 OPS

-MN OF Carlos Gomez: 4 2B, 0 HR, 2 RBI, 7 BB, .230 BA, .612 OPS

-MN OF Delmon Young: 1 2B, 1 HR, 14 RBI, 4 BB, .277 BA, .647 OPS

-MN SS Brendan Harris: 4 2B, 2 HR, 7 RBI, 6 BB, .267 BA, .687 OPS

And the sad:

-TB SS Jason Bartlett: 9 2B, 3 3B, 6 HR, 23 RBI, 10 BB, 12 SB, .376 BA, 1.041 OPS

-TB SP Matt Garza: 4 W, 2 L, 27 BB, 53 K, 3.41 ERA

-LAA OF Torii Hunter: 10 2B, 1 3B, 9 HR, 31 RBI, 19 BB, .306 BA, .956 OPS

-NYM SP Johan Santana: 5 W, 2 L, 13 BB, 67 K, 1.36 ERA

I’m not sayin’, I’m just sayin’…